Remember others at "The Most Wonderful Time of the Year"

OPINION - One of the favorite songs of this holiday season is "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year." But this may not be the most wonderful time for everyone...

Luther Vandross was outed as gay after his death.

One of the favorite songs of this holiday season is “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.” But the reality is that this may not be the most wonderful time of the year for everyone.

Sure, it is a wonderful time for employees who are able to get a paid holiday on Christmas and New Year’s days. But what about the millions of people who have no jobs and who have no tangible hopes of getting jobs soon. Not so wonderful.

Of course it is a fantastic time for families that gather at a family member’s home for the annual holiday get together. But it is not a wonderful time for those three million families that have lost their homes or are losing their homes to bank foreclosure and have no home in which to gather.

It is an exciting time for children to wake up at the crack of dawn and tear open the gifts that their mysterious benefactors have left for their delight. But it is not a wonderful time for the millions of families that are drowning in consumer debt and cannot afford to buy the gifts that have become the measure of our love for the other.

It is a nostalgic time for students to return home from college, soldiers to return home from war, and family generations to reunite after absences that have made hearts grow fonder. But it a very tough time for those who will celebrate for the first time without the presence of a loved one whose life has been cut short and whose presence has been limited to a bundle of memories.

Yes, this can be a wonderful time of the year – when there is a global recognition of the possibility of peace on earth and people rededicate to good will among all. But the “Joy to the World” that is our choral theme for the season often camouflages the vast undercurrent of melancholy and misery that permeates our social landscape. When we scratch beneath the surface of our ornamental smiles and ceremonial bliss, things can look quite ugly.

It is not the most wonderful time of the year for the half million children in foster care, the 45 million people that cannot afford to go to the doctor and the 25 percent of our female population that have been victims of domestic violence. The increased levels of depression, the increased consumption of alcohol, the likelihood of first time drug use and spike in the number of suicides and attempted suicides all point to the fact that this may be “The Most Dangerous Time of the Year.”

But this can be a great time of the year. We can defy the so-called experts who have made us responsible for economic recovery by recklessly spending money we do not have. We can focus on giving to others gifts that cost no money: attention, service, love, appreciation, and respect. We can connect with people who share our values, celebrate the victories we’ve had, and the potential that yet remains. We can look inward rather than outward and make a commitment to character growth and not simply financial growth.

It might require some help. It could even require professional help. But if we honestly assess who we are, what we have, and where we are going, we can take action on our potential, and this can very well be the best time of the year.

Happy Holidays!

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