Nicki Minaj opens up on abortion: It’s haunted me all my life

Recording artist Nicki Minaj performs onstage at the 2014 American Music Awards at Nokia Theatre L.A. Live on November 23, 2014 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

Recording artist Nicki Minaj performs onstage at the 2014 American Music Awards at Nokia Theatre L.A. Live on November 23, 2014 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

Share The GrioShare The Grio

In an interview with Rolling Stones, Nicki Minaj gave a fans a rare look into some of her most private and emotional thoughts.

Perhaps the most surprising was the revelation that Minaj had an abortion as a teenager and is still haunted by the decision. “I thought I was going to die. I was a teenager. It was the hardest thing I’d ever gone through…. [It’s] haunted me all my life. It’d be contradictory if I said I wasn’t pro-choice. I wasn’t ready. I didn’t have anything to offer a child,” she said.

The rapper has hinted at her past in tracks like “Autobiography,” in which she calls herself “mommy” and her more recent “All Things Go,” in which she raps about her younger brother and says, “My child with Aaron would have been 16, any minute/ So in some ways I feel like Caiah is the both of them/ It’s like he’s Caiah’s little angel, looking over him.”

Minaj is not usually one to let her private life become public, but she has changed directions, at least a little bit, and on her own terms. “One of my goals was to give people a glimpse into my personal life, because it’s something I’ve kept very private,” she admitted.

Finally, Minaj added a bit of advice to those who criticize her for her sexual: “I stand for girls wanting to be sexy and dance, but also having a strong sense of themselves. If you got a big ol’ butt? Shake it! Who cares? That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be graduating from college.”