Diversity in the dorms: How roommates handle race

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For many young adults, enrolling in college comes with a lot of firsts: their first time living away from home, first time managing their own finances and, for many, their first time living with someone of a different race.

According to the National Center for Education Statistics, there are 30.4 million 18-to-24-year-olds enrolled in post-secondary institutions. Only 14.3 percent of those students are black — which means many black students wind up placed with non-black roommates. And experts expect the trend to continue.

Naomi’s Story

As a military brat, Naomi Prileau had lived all over the country before her family settled in Fort Leavenworth, Kan.

“Growing up on base, there was a lot of diversity. But predominantly, (the town) is white,” said Prileau, 22, who is African-American. “I’ve always been surrounded by that, so it never bothered me.”

When Prileau was assigned three white roommates during her freshman year at Santa Fe College in Gainesville, Fla., things went relatively smoothly. (One hiccup: “When they’d see me greasing my scalp out in the living room, they’d be like, ‘What are you doing?’”)

But after a year and a half, all three roommates moved out of the apartment. Prileau found herself with three new white girls.

“That was terrible,” Prileau said.

Take the time she came out of her bedroom after a party to find a bag of Goldfish crackers with the n-word scrawled on it.

“All their parties were predominantly Caucasian parties. There wasn’t an ounce of color,” Prileau said. “So I know if had to be one of them or their friends.” When she confronted her roommates about the slur, they brushed her off.

The roommates’ antics continued, with Prileau never quite sure if they had racist motives.

For instance, they’d blast hip-hop music and ask Prileau if she’d heard the latest song by the rapper Plies. (“Is this them mocking me, or is them them actually liking this music?” Prileau thought to herself.)

Even more uncomfortable was the night of Barack Obama’s 2008 presidential win.

“I was watching it on TV, and I was really excited,” Prileau said. “From my window, I could see all the black people in my apartment complex come out into the middle of the street.”

Her roommates went outside and told them to shut up.

“Is it because he’s a Democrat or is it because he’s black?” Prileau still wonders.
Aditi’s Story

Prileau’s friend Aditi Maharaj also found herself living with roommates of another ethnicity for the first time at the University of South Florida in Tampa.

Maharaj, who was born in Trinidad of Indian descent, grew up in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

“My friends were all different types of cultures,” said Maharaj, 24.

So she had no qualms rooming with two Haitians and a Jamaican. In fact, because of their shared Caribbean heritage, Maharaj found common ground with her roommates — for instance, their love of curry.

“We would cook together all the time,” Maharaj said.

But the girls’ Haitian music took some getting used to.

“They would kind of play it loud,” Maharaj said. Still, she grew to love the genre and, as a result, felt at ease attending Haitian parties with her roommates.

Maharaj had the right idea, according to Brian Bridges, vice provost for diversity, access and equity at Ohio University in Athens.

“I’d encourage the roommates to educate themselves about the other’s culture through some formal means (a course, or purchasing a well-regarded publication), then explore the other’s culture through attending campus events or the like,” Bridges wrote in an email to theGrio.

Lessons Learned

Today, Maharaj works as a nurse and attends graduate school. Prileau, who eventually transferred to the University of South Florida, works in public relations. Both women live in Tampa. Alone.

Surprisingly, Prileau still keeps in touch with one of her roommates from those “terrible” Goldfish cracker days.

“We started to see eye to eye on some things,” Prileau said.

Bridges, the diversity officer, encourages roommates to find common ground. By reflecting on their own biases and talk openly about their differences, “they will be more prepared for the racially and ethnically diverse world in which they will live, learn and lead in the future,” Bridges wrote. “It not only serves them, but their communities, our society and the world at large.”