Staff Sgt. Jonathan Charlot was just about to head home for Christmas when he found a racially-charged death threat painted on his car.

Charlot was just leaving Fort Hood on Dec. 23 with the intention to drive home to Houston for the holiday season when he found the words “Die N****r” sprawled in spray paint across the side of his car. What’s more, all four of his tires had been slashed, a window was smashed, and someone had poured gasoline all over the inside of the car.

Charlot’s friend, John Martinez, started an online donation fund for Charlot to pay for the damage done to his car among other things, and Martinez wrote in the caption for the fundraising page, “Although racism still exists in this country, I never thought I would realize this kind of hatred personally.I can’t imagine the emotions my best friend is experiencing but my hope is to raise enough money for him to purchase a new vehicle since his insurance will not cover such an incident.”

As for Charlot, the incident has left him feeling disillusioned and upset with the country he is sworn to protect.

“It makes me feel disgruntled, unwanted — that the America I love isn’t the same anymore,” he said.