B.O.B. continues his social media stream of falsehoods and foolishness

Nov 6, 2017

B.O.B. is deep, y’all.

He’s so deep we can’t even find him with the scuba gear and the lights they use to search for giant squid and Lockness monsters.

The rapper has raised eyebrows again with his recent claims that the North American slave trade didn’t actually happen. He took to social media to share his mind-bending thoughts causing cackles around the world.

“They say slavery lasted 400 yrs… America is only 250 yrs old… You ever seen a slave ship? They can find a billion year old dinosaur bone but can’t find any slave ships,” he posted on Instagram along with a video and #SlaveryIsNotInMyDNA.

The reasoning behind this absurd assertion is even more comical that his insistence that earth is flat. According to the star, he knows slavery was a hoax because he hasn’t seen a slave ship. That’s the reason. Why can’t you open your mind and understand? You’re not deep enough to get it.

What a relief. I’ve been dealing with the knowledge that the country I lived in enslaved my ancestors and still carries out the ramifications of that system to this day. Glad we cleared that up. Phew.

Lucky for us, Bobby Ray isn’t stingy with his existential breakthroughs. He regularly shares them on social media and we have rounded up a few of our favorite musings from this musically inclined mystery solver. Thanks to his bravery, we may make it out of The Matrix after all.

If you are “woke” or “high” enough to get on B.O.B.’s level, you can still donate to his crowd-funding campaign to launch satellites into space to prove the earth is truly flat. He only needs $994,000 more bucks to make his million-dollar goal. Good think this genius on the case because no one has ever launched satellites into space to look at the earth before.

What a genius.

Maybe B.O.B. can use his age-old wisdom to crack some cases he’s better qualified for like…how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?