Jodie Turner-Smith opens up on hating her dark skin in high school: ‘I remember how badly I hated myself’

Jodie turner-smith
(Photo by Emma McIntyre/Getty Images)

Even though Jodie Turner-Smith is tuning heads as the stunning star of Queen & Slim, the actress didn’t always embrace her beauty.

She recently opened up on social media about how much she hated her looks when she was in high school and took time to highlight her inner and outer glow up.

WATCH: Melina Matsoukas on casting British leads in ‘Queen & Slim’: “All they see is Blackness”

“Proof That The Glow Up Has Been Really Real ??? it’s been soooo long since i’ve seen these pictures, but because the internet is undefeated, i found them! a blast from the past! i’m humbled when i look at this girl. 17 year old me. not just because of how i look on the outside, but because i remember how i felt on the inside. i remember how badly i hated myself and hated the dark skin that made people call me ugly. how i turned my helplessness at being unable to change my outward appearance inward, by constantly cleaving away any and all parts of myself that i was told made me unacceptable to others. how i changed my voice, changed my hair, became captain of this and president of that, used my intelligence to build a wall around me, spent years in the practice of bending and shaping myself into the most acceptable form of Jodie for the people around me until there was nothing of me left but hate for a person i didn’t recognise and fear that i had become someone it was impossible to come back from…
AND, MY GOD, IT WAS EXHAUSTING!,” she posted.

“but i say all that to say this— i am grateful for the girl in these photos and for every part of this journey. because i couldn’t be me, now, if i wasn’t first her, then. when you know what it feels like to hate yourself, finally loving yourself is a freedom that cannot be matched by anyone else’s approval ??? also worth noting— i was voted Most Likely To Succeed! but we all thought it would be in somebody’s office ?”

 

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