CNN’s René Marsh on giving birth 2 years after losing 2-year-old son to brain cancer
CNN National Correspondent René Marsh opens up about pressing forward with motherhood after loss and her newfound sense of hope.
CNN’s René Marsh has a new source of hope in her life.
Two years after the death of her 2-year-old son Blake to brain cancer, the CNN national correspondent has given birth to a baby girl. Marsh told People magazine her daughter Siena, born last month, “has, and forever will, serve as a reminder of hope.”
“I felt happy to be able to have this chance again to be a mom again,” said the journalist. “And it was finally happening for us, the fact that I was pregnant again gave me hope. It gave me something to look forward to that was positive. This pregnancy really renewed my spirit of hope.”
Marsh was still deeply grieving the loss of her son while pregnant, experiencing a “constant tug and pull” between a mix of emotions. Her daughter’s movement in the womb particularly impacted her.
“Through the tears, her gentle and sometimes not-so-gentle kicks in the womb reminded me more was on the horizon,” Marsh explained. “I will tell her one day how her kicks gave me hope at a time of great heartbreak.”
The tears returned the day Siena was born; reflecting on the magnitude of pushing through her grief to make it to motherhood for a second time, Marsh said she felt accomplished.
“I think that’s where the tears were coming from, and there were tears of relief, there were tears of happiness, but there were also tears of reflection of just all the battered, bruised journey that I had taken to get to this point,” she said.
Marsh is using self-reflection to continue her healing process.
“It’s important to take a self-assessment of what you have been able to endure so far, even if you’re still enduring it, and give yourself a pat on the back, that reflection is important,” she said.
Marsh also intends to keep mothering both of her children, saying parenting daughter Siena will be “traditional” since she has her in the physical sense, but she will also continue to “mother” Blake through her work and activism. She recently partnered with the Pediatric Brain Tumor Foundation and has released a children’s book in Blake’s honor, with 100% of the proceeds benefitting pediatric brain cancer research.
“I’ll never get over the loss of my son,” Marsh said. “But now I have the love of my daughter to at least give me the balance that I was lacking before she got here.”
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