What are the rules of a Black cookout?

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Summer is unofficially here, and it’s time for the first cookout of the year. TheGrio’s Marc Lamont Hill, Touré and Dr. Christina Greer go over the rules of a Black cookout. What are you listening to? Who’s invited? More importantly — who’s not invited?

Hill: It is Memorial Day weekend. So for Black families, that means doing a little something on the grill, playing the best music. And you know that one family member that might have one, two, three, or 17 drinks too many. So when y’all go to y’all cookout, the first question I got for y’all is what are three songs that must be played?

Greer: Well, you have to have Frankie Beverly’s “Before I Let Go.”

Touré: That’s my first answer.

Greer: Like, and it doesn’t need to be the Beyoncé remix because I’m going to say something somewhat controversial. If it was anyone else who had remade a Frankie Beverly song, we wouldn’t be supporting it. That song was perfect. Frankie Beverly does not need a remake. So, it’s like I’m playing Frankie Beverly’s version, and that’s what I need. No cookout is complete without that song.

Hill: Touré, what else is on your list?… Give me a song.

Touré: I would throw in “One Nation Under a Groove.” That’ll get everybody dancing and grooving together.

Hill: OK. Do y’all have any music that was made since Black people had the right to vote?

Touré: Wow. You know, Chrissy, you see what happens?

Greer: Well, Touré I’m never invited on the show, so this is like, only my second time being here. So I’m not used to the shade.

Touré: Well, look — if you want to keep it real, Marc, we’re playing “Trap Queen.” We’re playing “Trap Queen” because he [Fetty Wap] messed up, but he’s still our brother, and he’s going to come back someday. So we’re going to play “Trap Queen” in his honor.

Hill: OK. OK, guys.

Greer: I mean, obviously, I’m going to play some Biggie at any cookout that I have. Biggie’s first album from start to finish, and I probably won’t play the edited version just because it needs to be a full, complete album. But, you know, I think if you just run with Frankie Beverly, honestly, that’s all you really need at a cookout. And obviously some Steve Wonder too.

Touré: Y’all, see, you’re reading my mind. I was going to say you could put on “Music of My Mind” or “Talking Book” and just walk away and just let that rock for an hour; that’s a party.

Greer: You absolutely can. That’s it. That’s all you need.

Touré: I know with all of Marc’s time, he wants to hear about Lil Uzi Vert. But that’s not what we got. OK?

Hill: Don’t get mad at me cuz y’all are officially the old people at the cookout. Y’all are the aunties and uncles at the cookout, officially. Y’all are the ones gone be asking when they gettin’ married. You gonna be telling them how you knew them since they was a little baby. I get what y’all got. I got one more question for you and I only got 32 seconds. All right. You gotta invite one white person, who you invite?

Greer: Why do we have to invite one white person? I’m just curious.

Hill: Because Touré wrote an article about white people who get invited to the cookout. This is based on a Touré article. My position is I don’t believe in cookout invites.

Greer: Marc, honestly, I think we’re inviting too many people to the cookout. I think that this… We need to have a collective Black people meeting, all 44 million of us who live here, because we’re inviting way too many people to the cookout. And some folks don’t know how to act.

Hill: How about this? Is there a Black person who should get uninvited?

Greer: Clarence Thomas. First thing. First thing. Never.

Touré: Candace Owens.

Hill: That’s an easy one. Candace Owens…OK. All right… I’m a throw Kanye in there, too, so that’s a nice triumvirate of people who no longer get the cookout.

Greer: But he doesn’t want to come to the cookout.

Touré: No, he does.

Hill: That is actual and factual. Clarence Thomas don’t want to come to the cookout either. I guarantee he’ll be at a craft fair somewhere. 

Greer: Ginni’s already calling the police, telling us to turn down our music.

Hill: Hahahaha. That’s good. That’s good. Dr. Greer, Touré, thank you so much for joining me.

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