It’s a storyline that as old as time: A woman prioritizes her work and comes home to a glass of wine every evening. Sitting on her plush couch in a silk robe, she’s firing off emails, trying to forget another relationship that didn’t work out. She takes another sip. She’s a boss, dynamic, successful — and lonely. She’s a workaholic who enjoys the fruits of her labor, but she also wants to find love.
Frankly, the story is played out, but art imitates life, right? We know this woman. Some of us are this woman. So how do we rearrange a life built on hard work and sacrifice to get our shot at love? According to dating coach Bree Jenkins, it starts with getting real with yourself.
“You can’t fix what you deny, so get honest with yourself about the fact that this is out of proportion for what you want for your goal. Your work life is unbalanced to support you in meeting your romantic goal,” said Jenkins.
Let’s switch the character, and look at the male executive who goes home to a cold penthouse and takeout every night but is ready for a warm, inviting home with a partner to enjoy his life with.
Are we telling him to prioritize love? Jenkins says we should be.
“Anyone who is a workaholic has to make space for love, period. Point blank. It doesn’t matter if they’re a successful male CEO or successful female CEO. If your love life is out of balance, it’s out of balance. No one wants to be in a relationship with someone who hasn’t invested in who they are outside of their job,” said Jenkins.
It sounds pretty easy, right? If you want to find love, go on dates. Want to meet a partner? Make yourself available and put yourself out there. But when work is all-consuming and you’re knee-deep in responsibility, how does this happen? Just like you make everything else happen, says Jenkins.
“The same way you plan everything else—time block. Take time out for dates, for online dating, for going out. Bring in a passion partner. A wing woman. Go out intentionally so that we’re going to have fun regardless. But you know what? We’re going to be open to finding love. Create some space in your life to actually give love a chance,” said Jenkins.
To hear more tips on how to break free of working around the clock and make room for love, watch the full conversation on “The Reset with Coach Tish,” above.
Letisha Bereola is a life coach who helps ambitious women overcome burnout and reach their career goals, so they feel great at work and happy at home. She’s a former Emmy-nominated TV news anchor, Podcast host of AUDACITY, and a speaker. Learn more at www.coachtish.co.
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