As Destiny’s Child once sang, when going through a hard time, sometimes all you need is your “girls.” For former “Bachelorette,” author and podcast host Rachel Lindsay, her friend, actress Tia Mowry, was a big source of support during her divorce from Bryan Abasolo.
After finalizing her own divorce in April 2023, Mowry reportedly shared some “freeing” words of wisdom with Lindsay.
“She said, ‘Don’t look at the past; it will hold you back. Don’t look at the future; it’ll give you anxiety,’” Lindsay told E! News, recalling Mowry’s advice. “‘Every day, stay in the present because every day you make it through and you get stronger.’ And I say that to myself every single morning … My biggest fear is loss of control, and that’s the space that I’m in now. And so when she said that to me, it was like a burden had lifted off. It was very freeing.”
In 2017, Lindsay made history as the first Black star of “The Bachelorette,” ABC’s popular reality dating show. She gave the final rose and married Abasolo. Then, in January 2024, the couple announced the end of their marriage.
“After more than [four] years of marriage, Rachel and I have made the difficult decision to part ways and start anew,” Abasolo said in a statement, as previously reported by theGrio. “Sometimes loving yourself and your partner means you must let go.”
“Obviously, it’s a difficult time — if you’ve read the headlines,” Lindsay admitted while speaking about the divorce on her podcast, “Higher Learning with Van Lathan and Rachel Lindsay.” “But to be honest with you, I need to distract myself from myself, and the best way to do that is to do something that I love, and I love ‘Higher Learning’ … I’m not going to talk about it. I will eventually, but now is not the time. Just trying to take it day by day.”
Since the divorce, Lindsay said, she no longer worries about things she can’t control and works to stay in the present by participating in healing activities, like traveling and taking things as they come.
“I’m doing things that can heal me from within, and then I’ll be better on the outside,” she said, highlighting how helpful self-care and self-reflection have been. “So that’s meditation, that’s prayer, that’s exercise, that’s stepping outside and just being one with nature, that’s spending more time with family and friends, that is changing my hair color so I look and feel good.”
Like Lindsay, Mowry felt compelled to embark on a healing journey following her divorce from fellow actor Cory Hardrict, her husband of 14 years. Believing in the power of dialogue, the “Sister, Sister” star has been very candid about the “waves of emotions” that accompany divorce.
“As women, we take our power back by sharing our stories and bringing any deep shame we hold from this experience into the light,” Mowry said, per theGrio.“Recovering from a divorce feels like a whirlwind journey. I found that through the process, divorce isn’t a place where we arrive. It’s entering a new chapter of life with many nuances and no one-size-fits-all handbook.”