Are blacks ignoring proof that spanking has a negative impact?
CLUTCH - I have been waiting, patiently, for someone to give me one reason — other than the immediate gratification of getting a child to stop in that moment and 'police won’t beat them' — that proves hitting children as a form of discipline is effective...
I have been waiting, patiently, for someone to give me one reason — other than the immediate gratification of getting a child to stop in that moment and “police won’t beat them” — that proves hitting children as a form of discipline is effective. What lesson is learned other than fear and submission to authority — when in their presence? I have heard horror stories from parents with children that they “have to” lay out with belts to get them to listen, and then lay them out again when they don’t listen again. Of course, as parents, we have to do what’s best for our children and there is no universally accepted blueprint, but the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. All that I want is for people, specifically in the black community, to consider that hitting children might not be all we’ve been been trained to believe that it is.
Yes, trained.
When we were on plantations in the antebellum South, and massa wanted us to behave, what did he do?
He whipped us.
When we attempted to read and think for ourselves, what did he do?
He whipped us.
When we tried to run away and assert our autonomy, and massa’s overseer caught us, what did he do?
He whipped us.
When massa said we were being “disrespectful,” what did he do?
He whipped us.
To keep us in line, working hard and obedient, he whipped us, and that is the exact same thing that we do to our children. I find it no small coincidence that in the Deep South, the place that most condones corporal punishment as a form of discipline, black people are statistically less educated, have less money, less property, and are discriminated against in the judicial system to astronomical levels.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it doesn’t seem like the rod is working out too well.
Let’s be clear: Child abuse and corporal punishment are two different things. One is criminal; I simply disagree with the other based on research and anecdotal evidence that I’ve seen for myself. Teaching a child at a young age when verbal communication does not work about life threatening things, e.g., electrical sockets, hot water, cars, etc., is a necessity. Hitting a child because a legitimate form of discipline has not even been attempted is lazy.
I understand that many children of this generation seem to be out of control, but I’m honestly baffled by how many of us have to come to the conclusion that it’s from a lack of hitting. With corporal punishment currently occurring primarily in homes battling the intersection of race and class, and the vast majority of people in the black community still believing strongly that it’s effective, I would be hard pressed to pinpoint lack of hitting children as the reason why young people seem to be more disrespectful.
More like lack of parenting, period.
Some children are allowed to run wild doing whatever the hell they want to do, but parents don’t get upset until they feel disrespected. Then they want to whip them. I cannot understand the logic found in allowing a child to witness abuse in the home, then when that same child gets into trouble at school, they are, again, whipped for being aggressive. It is my opinion that many of our children are victims to over-exposure, unhealthy families, and lack of discipline – which again, is not synonymous with hitting.
My hope is that with the overwhelming evidence against corporal punishment, more parents will at the very least consider alternative forms of punishment. I want us to begin to trust ourselves as parents and not rely on a belt to raise our children. More importantly, I want us to look at the root of corporal punishment, then examine where, how, and when has it been beneficial. If at the end of the day, parents still choose to whip, spank, and slap their children to safety and success, at least they’ve put in due diligence and weighed other options before deciding what’s best for their children, instead of assuming what’s most effective because of generations of “spare the rod.”
Think. It’s not illegal yet.
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