Just admit it. You know you’ve thought about it. As much as you love America (or thought you didn’t), Donald Trump winning the presidency would be a deal-breaker.
You’ve checked your Facebook newsfeed daily hoping THIS would be the day it ended.
You were more wrong than Chris Rock bringing out Stacey Dash and little Asian children at the Oscars (not cool). More wrong than Steve Harvey announcing the “winner” of Miss USA. More wrong than Future talking about Ciara on Twitter (dirty laundry< dirty Sprite).
Super Tuesday’s election results only confirmed that our country is racing towards the nightmare of President Trump. He isn’t going anywhere. That means it may be time for us to get a passport and chuck the deuces to the U.S.A., at least until 2020.
Black people shouldn’t be afraid, though. We’ve honestly been through worse. And with the evolution of movements like TravelNoire, being black and foreign is a thing now.
That’s why we’ve assembled a list of the top five places black people can safely move if Donald Trump wins the Presidency. Because we don’t know about the rest of ya’ll, but we’re not waiting around to see what he does to America…
Why wouldn’t we want to return to West Africa and to our motherland for a true “sankofa” experience? There are more than a few countries in Africa that are worth considering, but Ghana ranks at the very top. The country has perhaps one of the more stable democracies in the continent and is very peaceful. There, your life’s savings will stretch a lot further too. The cost of living there is 15.86% lower than the United States. About 10,000 African-Americans visit Ghana yearly. Currently almost 3,000 American blacks reside in the capital, Accra, the major hub of Ghana; so you’ll be able to find a small community of black expats.
2. Dubai, United Arab Emirates
Remember when a select group of black folk found a website glitch, bought plane tickets for $100 and suddenly started posting pics on the ‘Gram from Dubai? (Your real friends would’ve texted you…) Turns out Dubai is actually really dope, as evidenced by all the people making their way there. The United Arab Emirates is known for incredible skyscrapers, great weather and luxury shopping. So you can buy all the Gucci cloth you want to make those Beyoncé “Formation” two-piece outfits.
3. Toronto, Canada
Because Drake. Caribana. The Raptors and All-Star Weekend. CN Tower. Justin Trudeau a.k.a “Young Obama.” Toronto is clean, and the people are super friendly. Just give us time, and we can learn to love and dominate hockey. After all, Canada was the destination of many slaves following the North Star to reach certain freedom. So isn’t a Trump Presidency the perfect opportunity to run through the 6 with our woes?
4. Havana, Cuba
President Obama gave us life when he opened up the doors to Cuba last summer after a 50-year embargo. We’d been dying to get in and get our tour on like Bey & Jay. Although the country is still recovering economically, the culture is rich, and proud black people are plentiful. But word on the island is that blacks aren’t reaping the benefits of all the new money flowing in. Let some black Americans come through and set up shop. We can start a new revolution…
You all remember Key and Peele’s dream town for Negroes? The place where you can wear a hoodie, get a home loan approved and live racism-free? Where there’s no market for preachy “how to get a man” books, because every black woman gets her own?
It doesn’t matter that it’s made up. Because as we’ve watched increasing racial intolerance, disdain for black self-love and growing systemic inequality, you almost want to believe this isn’t the real world in 2016.
This isn’t just about black people, though. Considering that Trump has insulted everyone and everything under the sun, if he wins the presidential election come 2017, it looks like a lot of people will be coming with us.
All jokes aside, before asking “Is my passport up to date?” let’s ask ourselves if we’re registered to vote. It counts, especially this year. To learn more about getting your election info, check out RockTheVote.com.