Kevin Ross The Podcast

Man, stop being so stingy. where my flowers at?

Episode 33
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The concept of “giving someone their flowers while alive” is typically something men don’t think or talk about. In preparing for his mother’s funeral, Kevin “Boss” Ross examines the true meaning behind the words, and challenges guys to start actually doing it. 

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You are now listening to TheGrios black podcast network, black culture amplified.

Hi, I’m Kevin Ross. And this is The Podcast. Man, Stop Being So Stingy. Where Are My Flowers At?

Giving someone their flowers while they’re still alive. It’s a heartwarming gesture, right? OK, OK. But as a society, let’s face it many find it a hair brain concept when we’re talking about men doing this for each other.

See, most guys believe flowers are only meant for either Mother’s Day or when they’re still trying to seal the deal with whatever situation they got going.

You understand what I’m saying? Let me think. Have I ever bought flowers for another man?

Mm actually, I have a couple of funerals and on select occasions for my sons when they were younger, celebrating milestone birthdays or graduations.

But I can’t imagine strolling up to my boy Dwayne on a random Wednesday with a bouquet of sunflowers saying, “yo, I just wanna shower you with some fondness. Let my dude know how much I treasure your existence.” Brother, man would probably be like, “what’s up, Boss Ross? You, you dying or something, wait, Did my wife tell you I’m dying?”

Listen, I need neither Daisy nor Daffodil to remind me of how much I’m regarded. Buy me some grub Mexican food, pizza that’s fire, A few plates of sushi. Hey, I’m straight. That makes sense to me.

While I’m still breathing. Tell me over drinks also on your tab how highly you think of me as opposed to waiting ’til I’m 6 ft under. That’s no bueno. See, I’m good not smelling the roses if that ain’t how you get down. Avery just make me laugh so hard I’m literally holding my stomach.

KB, go ahead and transfer some of your frequent flyer miles over. For once, Steven do my taxes for free player. See this communicates respect, difference, all the things that I can work with.

Seriously, I know you might be wondering why with everything going on in the world conflict in the Middle East, political chaos in Washington D.C., a crazy global resurgence of bedbugs for God’s sakes. Will and Jada, why, why would I pick this topic to speak on? Because I wrote this poem for my mother to be read at our upcoming funeral.

The title “Give Me My Flowers Now”. There was something she made a point to say often. So I put together a little something, something and hopefully folks won’t think it sucks when they read it.

But yeah, moms was big on wanting her words and contributions, acknowledged while she could still embrace the sentiment. The lady ate up the attention of like chocolate chip cookies.

Her kindness through service was unquestionable even though she was a trip and could be quite uh peevish. But hands down moms was as good at asking for her flowers as she was making sure others received theirs. Be it a heartfelt thank you card,a compliment or a “simple I see you.” She had a way of boosting others self esteem, encouraging them to continue their positive actions.

In hindsight, I’d say my mother was planning emotional seeds. See she wanted family and friends to understand how much they were cherished through actually and metaphorically giving people their flowers.

Ultimately, folks blossomed. In all likelihood, if we’re gonna keep it 100 I surmise the real reason my mother felt so strongly about the flower concept was that it contributed to her own joy.

I could be wrong, but I don’t know if men overall understand this. Many of us aren’t hardwired to think that way and certainly not to then express it.

And yet life is unpredictable. I I won’t speak for anyone else, but as I get older, sentimentality and nostalgia suddenly occupy a ton of space in my head.

Which is why I wanna be better at quote unquote, giving flowers to those I care about before I leave this earth. I want to be that guy who helps instill the practice into younger cats.I wanna cosign on an ever evolving culture of compassion through showing appreciation.

So here’s what we not gonna do what we not gonna do gents is wait on special occasions to express our feelings. No more tragic event serving as the impetus for that “Ah, why didn’t I do say XYZ before now”.

Women listening to the sound of my voice, I’m gonna need you to nudge that male in your sphere. Father, kin, son, lover, friend to step out their comfort zone and transfer some flowers to another, bro. Moving forward, everybody’s collecting flowers from me even if you’re not in close proximity.

That includes my guys whose names I referenced earlier. I am beyond blessed and grateful to have some incredible men on my journey and there are others for each one I give thanks. I love you, fellas.

What about you? If you haven’t already or you aren’t giving flowers on the regular, time’s up? Come on, you understand the assignment. Get to work. Now lets go.

I’m Kevin Ross and this is The Podcast powered by TheGrio. Follow me @IamBossRoss on Instagram and Twitter. Thanks for listening. See you next time.