Rachel Lindsay is no stranger to reality TV twists, but even she wasn’t ready for some of the surprising moments that took place during season two of MTV’s Ghosted: Love Gone Missing.
The 35-year-old Bachelorette alum said the season’s premiere episode, which airs on Wednesday, left her in shock.
“I was frazzled,” she said during an Instagram Live session with theGrio on Aug. 28. “There were so many twists and turns all the way—even until you got to the end of it. You know, like, there’s a phone call that happens that I was not prepared for at all. I don’t know if it comes through or not, but I’m like, my voice is shaking, I’m frazzled. I’m feeling like I’m all alone. I’m like, ‘This has never happened before what do I do!'”
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She continued, “I think that’s what’s so great about the show, in general, is there are so many dynamics when it comes to ghosting that you never know what you’re going to get. You never know what to expect, and you’re depending on these people to tell you the truth, and a lot of times they don’t.”
Now a happily married woman, Lindsay had her own experiences with ghosting (ending a relationship without any communication) back when she was single. The Higher Learning podcast host was once left in the dark for two years about a former love, who ghosted her to return to his child’s mother.
“I was dating a guy and it’s one of those relationships, I look back on it now and I’m like, it was so toxic. We were not right for each other,” she said about her ghosted relationship. “I’m dating him for years and one day I call him—and I talked to him the day before—and the number it goes, ‘The number you have reached is no longer in service.’ I’m like, ‘He changed his number on me!'”
She continued, “Two years later, I found out why he ghosted me. I ran into him, he had a child and he went back to the child’s mother. Now, they’re married and they have other kids and they have happily ever after. But for two years, I never had a serious relationship because I was stuck in a place of wondering, ‘Did I do something? Is he okay?’ You know, like, your pride is hurting. There’s shame and embarrassment associated with the fact that this guy just disappeared on you.”
The experience makes her especially qualified to co-host Ghosted alongside Travis Mills. It also gives the TV personality, who is married to Bryan Abasolo, a bit of insight on how single folk can avoid the harmful behavior.
“That [experience is] what gives me the heart and the passion that I have when it comes to the show, Ghosted, because I’ve been there. I feel you, I know what you’re going through,” she explained. “The only thing I would say is that you can’t be prepared for ghosting. A common theme is that the person who’s ghosted, blames themselves. I don’t know if that’s human nature or what, I did it in my own experience. What did I do? And a lot of times it’s nothing that you did, it’s that person.”
In addition to co-hosting Ghosted, Lindsay is also speaking out about several issues that are important to her, including the Black Lives Matter movement and the lack of diversity within Bachelor Nation.
With the announcement of the first black Bachelor (Matt James) and the reported confirmation of a second Black Bachelorette (Tayshia Adams), Lindsay is hopeful that the changes within the popular franchise are permanent.
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“The reason I continue to speak about diversity and inclusion is because I finished in 2017. I haven’t seen much change from then to June 2020,” she shared. “I have to remember why I wanted to do this and who I wanted to make a path for [young Black woman]. …I have talked with production and seeing changes that they’ve made, from statements to hiring people of color in production, to the rumor that there’s Tayshia as the Bachelorette, who’s a Latina and a Black woman, all of that I see.”
She concluded, “You want it to be a movement and not just for the moment. So my hope is that—I don’t want to be in a negative space where I’m thinking that this is just for now. I want to think that they’re putting the necessary changes in place where it doesn’t have to be a conversation, you just see it. You see it by the people that are coming on the show, by the couples that leave the show, by the leads, the contestants, who’s in the decision-making room. Where it doesn’t have to be a conversation because it’s just the lifestyle within the franchise.”
Ghosted: Love Gone Missing premieres on MTV on Wednesday, September 2 at 9PM ET/PT. Fans can watch theGrio‘s full interview with Lindsay above.
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